Red Flag Behaviors in Relationships: What to Watch Out For
- Rechelle Carroll
- Jun 25, 2024
- 3 min read

Relationships are foundational to our well-being, providing companionship, support, and
love. However, not all relationships are healthy, and some can be detrimental to our mental
and emotional health. Recognising red flag behaviours early can save you from prolonged
distress and heartache. Here are some key red-flag behaviours to watch out for in
relationships:
Controlling Behavior
One of the most glaring red flags is a partner who exhibits controlling behaviour. This can
manifest in various ways, such as dictating what you wear, who you can see, or how you
should spend your time. Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and autonomy,
not control and dominance.
Isolation from Friends and Family
If your partner tries to isolate you from your friends and family, it’s a major red flag. They
might do this subtly, by criticizing your loved ones or making you feel guilty for spending
time with them, or more overtly by forbidding you to see them. Isolation can lead to
dependency, making it harder for you to leave an unhealthy relationship.
Excessive Jealousy
While a little jealousy can be normal in relationships, excessive jealousy is a sign of
insecurity and possessiveness. If your partner is constantly suspicious, accuses you of
cheating without cause, or monitors your actions, it indicates a lack of trust and respect.
Lack of Communication
Effective communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. If your partner shuts
down conversations, avoids discussing problems, or refuses to communicate openly and
honestly, it can lead to misunderstandings and unresolved issues, eroding the relationship
over time.
Disrespect and Dismissiveness
A partner who consistently disrespects you, belittles your opinions, or dismisses your
feelings is toxic. Mutual respect is crucial in any relationship, and dismissiveness indicates
a lack of empathy, respect and understanding.
Manipulation and Gaslighting
Manipulative behaviours and gaslighting are serious red flags. Gaslighting involves making
you doubt your reality or perceptions, often making you feel confused or question your
sanity. Manipulation can take many forms, such as guilt-tripping or using emotional blackmail to control your actions.
Unresolved Anger and Violence
Frequent outbursts of anger, aggression, or violence are major red flags. Physical violence
is a clear sign of an abusive relationship, but emotional and verbal abuse can be equally
damaging. If your partner tends to lash out or harm you in any way, it's essential to seek
help and consider leaving the relationship.
Inconsistent or Unreliable Behavior
Trust is built on reliability and consistency. If your partner is constantly breaking promises,
lying, or being unreliable, it undermines the foundation of trust in your relationship.
Inconsistent behaviour can leave you feeling uncertain and insecure.
Lack of Support
A healthy partner should support your goals, dreams, and well-being. If your partner
consistently dismisses your ambitions, discourages your efforts, or shows indifference to
your achievements, it signals a lack of support and encouragement, which are vital for a
fulfilling relationship.
Erosion of Self-Esteem
Pay attention to how your partner makes you feel about yourself. If you find that your self-
esteem is eroding and you’re feeling more insecure, unworthy, or anxious due to their
behaviour, it's a significant red flag. A healthy relationship should bolster your self-esteem,
not diminish it.

Conclusion
Recognizing these red-flag behaviours is the first step towards safeguarding your
emotional and mental health. If you identify these signs in your relationship, it’s crucial to
address them, either through open communication with your partner or by seeking support
from friends, family, or a professional counsellor. Remember, you deserve a relationship
built on respect, trust, and mutual support. Don't hesitate to take action to protect your
well-being.
If you see yourself in these words, I'm here to support you on your journey. Let's take the next step together.
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